Merry Christmas, ya filthy animals

Merry Christmas!!!!! Well we just had Paddy's first Christmas in the UP of Michigan and I must say... It. Was. Amazing. I had so much fun hanging out and drinking with my family for the holidays. I gave them all their homemade Christmas presents early so everyone had a Monster Mash Christmas on Christmas Eve. Oh my god, it was so much fucking fun. Because this winter has unseasonably warm so far, we couldn't go snomobiling at all or skiing for that long. So one keg and several cases of beer later, we partied! And holy shit do the O'Ds know how to fucking party. I will never forget this trip or how much fun I had on it.

A Monster Mash Christmas!

  Patman had his first Christmas!! Absolutely loved it. Due to the excessive amounts of toys he already has, I had made him a dinosaur hoodie and a Batman blanket. He loved both. But what I was really excited about was giving Pat another Xbox after his first one got ruined in the flood. I and the rest of my family gave him a Star Wars Xbox and Paddy had gotten him a game for it. He was so excited about them, I think it made me more happy than the presents I received. Dude works so hard every day for Paddy and I, it makes me so happy to give him something he really wants. I fucking love that man :)

   Well, on that note, I better sign off. Merry Christmas, ya filthy animal. And a Happy New Year!

On His 22nd Birthday

Pat and I have a bet going. Pat bet Paddy will be '6"8 or over and I bet he"ll be '6"7 or shorter by his 22nd birthday.

There is $20 riding on this, son. Please make me proud.

My Morning So Far

4:13 am - Paddy is crying hysterically, so I feed him a bottle.

4:33 am - Put Paddy back to bed.

5:57 am - Paddy is crying hysterically, so I feed him a bottle.

6:12 am - Bring Paddy back to my bed in hopes he and I can get some more sleep.

6:30 am - Due to excessive humping of Pat's pillow and repeatedly knocking on the window, Paddy successfully convinces me to just get the fuck out of bed.

6:32 am - Paddy pulls the Christmas tree down on top of himself. I pick him up and realize he stinks.

6:33 am - Go to change him and realize (after putting my hand in his pajamas)  that he took a massive shit. Everywhere. NOT just in his diaper. I shout " Please God, no!!."

6:33 - 7:15 am - Project "Rid My House of Poo" commences. This includes a bath for Paddy, a shower for me, a load of laundry in the washer, taking out a bag of dirty diapers, and Paddy pulling down the Christmas tree on top of him again.

7:16 am - I put on a pot of coffee. Something tells me I should make it extra strong today.

7:17 am - Come back in the living room to find the tree down again and Paddy humping the angel that used to be on top of the tree.

It is currently 7:36 am. I wish I had some whiskey to put in my coffee.

Crawling

   Well, Paddy McGee is crawling. I was pretty proud of him crawling at first since he was only 6 months old. It lasted about 5 minutes. Dude is into everything! He's oddly facinated with the DVR, so that's usually the first place he'll go when I put him on the floor. That is, unless he's distracted by anything with a cord. Or just generally anything expensive. Pat's been trying to encourage him walking now too. Something I most definitely am not. Paddy can learn to walk on his own, the sooner he walks, the sooner he gets into my shit. The sooner he gets into my shit, the sooner I call my baby an asshole again. And I really don't want to call Paddy an asshole. So crawling it is!

   I finally went to get my hair cut and dyed last week. I realized the fat-midwestern-housewife look wasn't really working for me. The last time I went to the salon was before Paddy was born. So I had roots from over SEVEN months ago! Holy sheep shit, it looked terrible. Since my hair is usually in a knot on the top of my head, I guess I just didn't realize how bad it was getting. But now, I have beautiful, luxurious, and (completely) blonde hair. Yay me!